My first positive utterance of a sceptical nature probably occurred before my fifth birthday, when I was told what I really knew before, that “Santa Claus” is a myth. This admission caused me to ask why “God” is not equally a myth.
—H. P. Lovecraft, “A Confession of Unfaith” (1922)
From a strictly literal viewpoint, Christmas is a Christian holiday, the celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ. That simple truth, so celebrated and shorn of pretension during Linus’ famous recitation at the end of “A Charlie Brown Christmas” (1965) should not be forgotten or disputed. However, in the last two thousand plus years since the death of Christ, things have gotten complicated. How and when and why Christmas is celebrated has changed; traditions have arisen, fallen out of favor, or been borrowed in. Christmas tress became popular, and stockings, and gifts wrapped in bright paper and ribbons, but many of these are things essentially secular in nature, enjoyed both by devout Christians of various denominations and folks who have never darkened the door of a church.
The Christian origins have been bedecked by a more elaborate and peculiar mythology of traditions, folkore, fakelore, and rituals. The most notable entity outside the baby Jesus itself might be Saint Nicholas or Father Christmas or Santa Claus; but celebrants certainly know others. Song, story, and film have given St. Nick a wife, reindeer, and a troop of elves, at least in many English-speaking countries. A more shadowy and often peculiar extnded Christmas-time pantheon that might include the Krampus, Zwarte Piet, Père Fouettard, Belsnickel, Yule Cat, Befana, Grýla, Perchta, and Elf-on-a-Shelf, among others.
Why not add Cthulhu to the holiday mythos?
While Lovecraft may not have believed in Santa Claus, or even necessarily the historical Jesus, he certainly enjoyed Christmas, and even had a Christmas tree when he could afford it, exchanged gifts and notes with friends and family. Nor was he immune to the general charms that the holiday offered, as evidenced by “The Festival” (written 1923), where he imagines a strictly pagan celebration “that men call Christmas though they know in their hearts it is older than Bethlehem and Babylon, older than Memphis and mankind.”
Followers-on in the Lovecraftian tradition don’t necessarily go that hard. Some stories are just a bit of Xmas fun.
It was the night before Christmas, and in a haunted house on Ash street, a tiny creature in a floppy red Santa hat and coat manifest in the dark beneath an ornamented tree.
—Melissa McCann, “A Very Cthulhu Christmas” (2016)
This short tale is not a word-for-word riff off Clement Clarke Moore’s classic “A Visit from St. Nicholas,” although it probably takes general inspiration from the idea. Christmas Eve. The house is quiet. Everyone is safely tucked away. Yet something is stirring.
The short tale works because while it is set on Christmas Eve, it is also set in a haunted house whose inhabitants are more than a little eldritch, though many of the details and backstory are very much left hinted at rather than explicit. The story treads a fine line between humor and seriousness, and the overall tone is vaguely reminiscent of Roger Zelazny’s classic A Night in the Lonesome October. It is a very secular Christmas tale; Linus would have no place here, although a reading from the Necronomicon would probably be appreciated by the inhabitants of this particular house. Nor does McCann try to hamfistedly tie Santa Claus into the Mythos. It is a Christmas story in the way Die Hard is a Christmas story, because of setting and props, recognizable elements and old familiar names.
Which works. McCann isn’t trying to save the world and/or Hanukkah, or set up a Hallmark romantasy with tentacles, but she sets out to tell a well-paced, straightforward tale where the tropes of two very different cults mingle and overlap in ways that are both funny and appropriate.
“A Very Cthulhu Christmas” (2016) by Melissa McCann can be found as a standalone Amazon ebook, and is also included in her collection King of Midwinter (2019).
Bobby Derie is the author of Weird Talers: Essays on Robert E. Howard and Others and Sex and the Cthulhu Mythos.
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